Answered by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful and Compassionate
May Allah's peace and blessings be upon His Messenger Muhammad, his folk, companions, and followers
Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah,
I pray that you are well, and in the best of health and spirits. May Allah grant you all good in this life and the next.
Abdullah ibn Amr (Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, "This life is fleeting pleasure (mata`), and the best of its fleeting pleasures is a righteous wife." [Related by Muslim, Nasa'i, and Ibn Maja]
As is evident in the lexicons of Arabic, and the dictionaries of hadith language, mata` is used here in its linguistic sense of fleeting pleasure or provisions, and not in the sense of something one simply owns. [Ibn al-Mundhir, Lisan al-Arab; Ibn al-Athir, al-Nihaya fi Gharib al-Hadith] Ibn al-Athir says, "Mata` refers to anything one benefits from of worldly matters." [ibid.]
Those who seek to claim otherwise are superimposing their prejudices on the beautiful words of the Beloved Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him).
The Meaning of The Hadith
In this hadith, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) describes the wife as being the best of fleeting worldly pleasures for her husband because is a source of true, meaningful, and deep joy in this life, and is one of the strongest of provisions on one's journey to Allah and the Next Life--alluding to the two abovementioned senses of the word mata` ('fleeting pleasure'), and reminding us to turn to Allah in our worldly affairs, such as marriage, in order that their joy and benefit be eternal.
What About Women?
The very same applies in the case of women in regards to their husbands: the best of the fleeting pleasures and provisions of this life for women is a righteous husband.
This is understood from the very text of the hadith if one appreciates the fact that Arabs traditionally refrained from explicit public mention of women in some contexts, as it could be construed as immodest or undignified. However, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) reminded us that, "Women are the co-sharers of men," when it comes to the address of the Qur'an and Sunna and when it comes to rights and responsibilities--Allah tells us about the Qur'an that, "This is indeed an exposition for all humanity, and a guidance and reminder for those of piety." [Qur'an, 3.138]
Imam Suyuti says in his commentary on Sahih Muslim, al-Dibaj, "Fleeting pleasures (mata`) means something that one finds joy in for a time." [Suyuti, al-Dibaj `ala Muslim, 4.85]
Imam Munawi says in his Fayd al-Qadir, a commentary on Imam Suyuti's hadith collection, al-Jami` al-Saghir, that,
"Allah beautified worldly life with seven pleasures that He mentioned in His words [in the Qur'an], 'Beautified for mankind [is love of the joys of women and offspring; and stored-up heaps of gold and silver, and horses branded, and cattle and land. That is comfort of the life of the world. Allah! With Him is a more excellent abode.' (Qur'an, 3.14)]
These seven pleasures are the sources of joy in worldly life, and the goals of those who seek worldly matters.
The most general of this beautification and most tremendous in import is the desire for women, for a woman protects her husband from the haram, and assists him in fulfilling his worldly and religious duties. Every worldly pleasure that assists one in attaining unto the pleasures of the Next Life is beloved to Allah, and its seeker finds joy in it in this life as a blessing and comfort from Allah and also because it is a means of attaining unto the Pleasure of their Lord and a joy most lasting..." [Munawi, Fayd al-Qadir, 3.548-549]
Thus, there is nothing offensive in this hadith. Rather, it gives us a beautiful look into the deep well of meanings that is the guidance of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him), whose words and example are living commentaries of the Qur'an for all those who reflect and seek good.
Allah tells us,
"Truly, you have in the Messenger of Allah a most beautiful example for whoever seeks Allah and the Last Day and makes much remembrance of Allah." [Qur'an, 33.21]
And Allah alone gives success.
Wassalam,
Faraz Rabbani
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